Lane shares her journey after a loss

 Linda Lane, a native of West Point, has written a book, "Healed" sharing her journey through the loss of her son in a car accident.
Staff Writer

Linda Lane's life would never be the same after Memorial Day weekend 2011. Her son Benjamin was killed in a car crash.

"Unless you've lost a child, you have no idea of the depth of that loss," Lane said. "This person who was so much a part of you is gone. There is a hole ripped out of you that nothing will ever fill."

As part of her own healing and to provide help to others who are grieving, Lane wrote a book, 'Healed" to help those dealing with the loss of a loved one.

"This is my tribute to my son," Lane said. "The blue on the cover was his favorite color. The water and the clouds are peaceful. I write a blog called 'A Message From the Clouds.’ With God's help, I have peace in my heart. Although my son is always in my heart and my thoughts."

Lane said some people ask why isn't she over the loss yet? Why hasn't she moved on? It has been almost eight years. She said she will never be over it.

"There is no magic amount of time to grieve," Lane said. "People don't understand if I am in the grocery store and just break down in front of a display of Oreo cookies. He loved them, they were his favorite. It only takes little things to trigger a memory. I'm not crazy, and if during the grieving process it happens to other people, they aren't crazy either. It's just part of dealing with the loss."

That is why she felt led to write "Healed” — to help other people who, after a death, are lost. There is no handbook for how to deal with the death of a loved one, but "Healed" can help people to know they are not alone.

"We expect to lose our grandparents, parents, older aunts and uncles,' Lane said. 'But nothing can make us ready for the loss of our child. The loss of a spouse whom we have spent most of our lives with is also a terrible loss. But we aren't supposed to bury our children."

Lane wants people to know there is help available for those who are hurting and feel lost. Writing the book to help others also helped in continuing her own healing process.

"No one has to stay in that place of sorrow," Lane said. "It is a terrible place. There is healing and comfort in God and the faith we have in Him. I could not have made it without His love and comfort."

In her book, Lane is open about her loss and the process of making it through the worst of that time. She said she received strength from God to bear the loss of someone she loved so deeply.

"I've made it through this pain so I can help others," Lane said. "We are having a healing session, March 23, at the Growth Alliance. I want everyone to come who is hurting to share the pain and begin the healing process."

Lane's book, 'Healing" is available at Rose Drug Company, Amazon and